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He was met at the door by Gary, a man whose teeth were whiter than the fluorescent lights of the lobby. "Arthur! Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life!" Gary chirped, steering him toward a cramped office that smelled faintly of old coffee and desperation.

The "tour" was a brisk three-minute walk past a pool that was currently being drained and a "fitness center" consisting of a single, squeaky exercise bike. Then came the presentation. For four hours, Gary showed Arthur slides of sunsets and happy families, his voice rising in pitch every time Arthur mentioned the word "budget." cheap timeshare

"Oh, the purchase was cheap, Mr. Miller," the voice replied cheerfully. "But the property taxes, the roofing fund, the pool-cleaning surcharge, and the 'Atmosphere Enhancement Fee' are mandatory. It’s all in Section 14, Paragraph C. The part written in light grey ink." He was met at the door by Gary,